Lost in Place

How did the party wind blow?

Let me count the ways:

The wind was unbelievable.
There were no decorations. Because of the wind.
No cupcakes were put out. Because of the wind.
There were hardly any balloons. Because of the wind.
The presents weren’t put out. Because of the wind.
The favors weren’t put out. Because of the wind.
There was no yummy, pink punch. Because of the wind. (The favors had to go in the punch bowl so they wouldn’t blow away.)
The whole tradition of the first time the baby gets frosting and cake was ruined. Not because of the wind.
Nothing that I waited to get because why pack it all the way across the country?? was sold in that town. Also not because of the wind.
The present-opening didn’t work very well because we couldn’t put anything in front of her because it would blow away. Because of the wind.
No one could hear anyone else. Because of the wind.
The wind totally blew. In both senses of the word.

Grrrrrrrr.

I had started planning and working on this party months ago. Anyone who could ever possibly think the first birthday is for the child, is smoking crack or just simply an idiot. Of course it’s not for the child. She got a spoonful of cake and frosting so it was a total success in her eyes. Her eyes are not the ones that had to see everything that went wrong. Nope. Those were mine. It was supposed to be nearly perfect. I was planning it from 2,000 miles away so I knew it wasn’t going to be completely perfect. But for it to be a total disaster was not at all what I had in mind.

It was supposed to go like this:

One table with a pink table cloth for the cake and cutely setup cupcakes. A punch bowl with pink punch and ice. Pink cups, pink plates, pink utensils and pink napkins set up around a large pink centerpiece for a first birthday.
Another table with a pink table cloth for the presents. The presents wrapped in pink wrapping paper with pretty pink bows and pink gift bags (that were mostly NOT sold in ANY store in the ENTIRE city). The little favor bags of pink jelly bellies with cute pink “thank you” tags stacked nicely, next to another pink, first birthday centerpiece. A silver and pink banner draped along the edge of the table that read “Happy 1st Birthday!.”
Balloons were supposed to be attached in bunches to the edges of both tables. A banner was supposed to be hung with streamers.
A third pink covered table, with decorations for people to sit at and enjoy their adorable cupcakes and yummy ice cream while they watch the adorable birthday girl, in her PERFECT birthday outfit bathe in cake and frosting while she tasted it for the very first time ever cuz that’s what the first birthday is for you know.

But… that is not how it played out. Not at all.

Want to know what happened to all those decorations and banners and things? Well hopefully my sister feels like throwing a PINK first birthday for her baby because they were useless for mine. They sat in a bag, under a table, that ended up having Sprite dumped all over them because – oh, imagine that, the wind blew over the cups that were left unwatched.

Needless to say, I was very discouraged, disappointed and pissy. However, that did NOT stop me from loving watching that little kid with her first cupcake. Or watching her munch on a spoon covered in cake and frosting for a good half hour. Or watching her not give a damn about all the cool presents so long as she had that spoon in her mouth and everyone’s attention. So – while the first party was a disaster, the spirit of it was a complete success. And so were her outfits! She had a cute pink dress for her party and then, to get all messy and covered in frosting, I made her a onesie and bib to go along with the cupcake part of the theme. Which, really, was such a good idea. I can’t imagine trying to get frosting out of anything else, or at least cleaned up enough to put her in a car, and she had it EVERYWHERE. Granted, she didn’t get in the cake like I had hoped (since that’s why I even made it), but she sure did get frosting everywhere from the cupcake she devoured.

At least there are some adorable pictures that came from it. And she had such a blast, she passed out at the end. And really, isn’t that how EVERY good party should end?