WARNING: Not for the faint of heart. Or those without children.
I woke up to Madeleine whimpering and crying way too early this morning. That early, I usually let her deal with it by herself and go back to sleep. She wasn't giving up so I knew she wouldn't be falling back asleep on her own so I went in to check on her. The second I pushed the door open I knew it was going to be a bad day.
My nose inhaled, my stomach churned and my head thought, "You are the worst mother ever. Why weren't you in here immediately?!"
She was trying to stand up as I walked over to her but she was so tipsy and out of it she was flailing all over the place. And covered head to toe in throw up. So I didn't really want her trying to move around. I got to her and immediately pulled her clothes off, noticed the mess in the bed and felt horrible that she had to spend a second in there let alone whatever god-forsaken amount of time she had actually been in there.
I stripped her down and wrapped her in a blanket and put her in her rocking chair. She sat there, quiet as a mouse and still as could be while I stripped her bed down while - unsuccessfully - holding my breath. The sheets, the pillow, the crib-bumper, the blanket, her pajamas, all of it went straight into the washer. I picked her up, her head and chest covered in it as well, and took her into the bathroom to put her in a bath. Just my luck, it's where I had emptied her sheet before putting it in the washer and the drain decided not to well - drain. It does this every now and again and of course, the one time I really need it, it clogs.
It's barely after 6 in the morning, Dan has to be up for work soon and I feel bad that we're being so noisy trying to get things cleaned up down the hall as it is. But I give up and take her into our bathroom and run a bath for her in there. A thorough soaping and hair washing and she still reeks of vomit. I can tell she's exhausted, she had tried to drink a little bit of milk while I cleaned up (I know. She's puking. What the hell was I thinking giving her milk??? I was only half awake, it was ready and I needed something to keep her occupied while I abandoned her to try to get the stink out of her room.) and she actually wanted out of the tub, which she never does. We dry her off, put a diaper on her and I bury the guest bed in towels and her mattress covers - just in case - and she passes right out.
An hour later, she wakes up. She's happy and hyper as can be and wants her daddy. She gets out of bed, heads down the hall and not 30 seconds later she comes running back losing every bit of milk and god knows what else was left in her stomach the whole way. I jump up, grab her, put her in the sink and start all over again. Take her back to the bath tub since Dan was in there getting ready anyway and head to the hallway to clean up the mess.
Here's the cool part, my father-in-law gave us a SpotBot for Christmas that we've been longing for for ages. Not a huge need now that we don't have the dogs, but we were sure it'd come in handy at some point. Boy, did it. I LOVE this thing. Granted, it didn't come with nearly enough cleaner, I'll be buying more of that tonight. But man does it work wonders. So while Dan ran to the store before he went to work to get Pedialyte and Drano, I cleaned up the floors and got Madeleine settled in with Elmo.
She ran around, wanted to go whee! (her way of telling you to play ring around the rosies with her), went through the cupboards, the pantry, climbed up and down the stairs and who knows what else. She was fine. Except that little belly. After a while, she gave up and realized she was really tired so sat next to me and watched Elmo for a little while.
Two and a half Elmo- viewings later, she gave up sitting next to me, face-planted on the couch and hasn't moved since.
The best part about all of this? The nurse said it's highly contagious, "so you might want to just accept it now. You can't get away from it." But I'm already missing a day of work today. I have things to do this week. I was going to get to go out with friends for the first time since I moved out here. I can't get sick. No. I refuse. I say as I sit here feeling my stomach getting queasy and mouth getting watery. Though that could just be from still smelling it everywhere I turn and wanting to fumigate my entire upstairs before I have to go up there again.
The worst part is that I have been so hungry but didn't want to eat in front of her because she would want something and she shouldn't have it. So I guess I should go take advantage of her sleeping and finally get some food. And I don't know, maybe shower or get dressed finally. Or something.
UPDATED TO ADD:
Seriously! Only *I* could do this. I went up to empty the SpotBot because who wants throw-up water sitting in a container all day? This was the first time I've used it so I just went with intuition and history of other similar products. I got the container off, picked it up and went to readjust the way I was carrying it. Instead, unlike every other water container on a machine, this one didn't have a freaking lid!!! So the yucky, gross, nasty water went all down my leg and right back to all over the floor. I guess Resolve is a good back up until I can get to the store for more cleaner for the SpotBot. Which I still love. It's not its fault that I don't WATCH. what. I. am. doing!
